I've been having some honest moments with myself over the last month or so and have found them to be very therapeutic. By honest moments I just mean I've tried to put away the bullshit and really tune into how Darby is doing and what I'm really all about.
This was spurred by a conversation that I had with a friend about core values. During our conversation we were discussion the core values of a business and how she felt that it's important that those values line up with your own. It was at that very moment, I realized I didn't really know what my own core values were. Many of us, including me, claim to understand our values, but cannot articulate them clearly.
Ever woken up and wondered how the heck you got your life into the mess it's in? That's from a lack of understanding and following your core values. Your values act as your compass, your true north, so without them you feel lost. When we aren't living a life in line with our values, we can feel stressed, anxious, depressed and lost. What many of us don't realize, is that by getting clear on what our values are we can start to live a life that's truly fulfilling.
After the conversation I had with my friend, I knew it was time for me to get really clear on my core values. So, thanks to a great article by Kevin Daum, I was able to ask myself some strategic questions so that I could get to the center of what I really value in this life. Let's give it a try.
Step 1: Think through and describe the following in detail:
What have been your three greatest accomplishments?
What have been your three greatest moments of efficiency?
What are any common rules or themes that you can identify?
Step 2: Think through and describe the following in detail:
What have been your three greatest failures?
What have been your three greatest moments of inefficiency?
What are any common rules or themes that you can identify?
Step 3: Identify three or four brief sentences of advice you would give to yourself based upon these commonalities.
Step 4: Next try and reduce them to a few words. This process may take some time, and pressure testing, but over the course of a couple of weeks, you'll come to find what your true core values are.
Thanks to these questions from Kevin Daum, I was able really understand what it is that I stand for.
For example, when I think back on one of my greatest accomplishments, it was leaving my marketing position in tech and becoming a full time health and wellness coach. I felt efficient, focused and energized in that decision and was able to create a successful career out of it. At the core of that decision, and what I believe made me successful, was authenticity. I've always been as open and truthful as possible on this blog and with all of my clients. It's at the heart of my business, my interactions with friends and family and what I believe people really connect with. Through this exercise, I was able to articulate that my authenticity was at the core of my being. I always want to be authentic, in everything that I do.
This exercise is ongoing for me but something that has really helped me make a shift in my thinking. I feel much more confident knowing what my values are and what I stand for. It's like starting a business, you want to build out the cornerstones of the company so that you don't stray from them as the company grows. Your life should be the same way so that you don't stray from the true YOU!
Take 20-30 minutes in the next couple of days and answer the questions above. You'll be surprised at how much clarity it will bring you! Next week, I'll be going more in depth on my other core values so stay tuned! xo
Darby
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Core Values Questionnaire from Kevin Daum: https://www.inc.com/kevin-daum/define-your-personal-core-values-5-steps.html